Chuggers and others in your very home!
These days the Charity Mugger phenomenon is such a part of city life that we no longer feel any pangs of guilt when we brush past these brightly-dressed and cheerful, cash-seeking missiles as they obstruct our passage along Cruise's St or Bedford Row.
But I'm not here to tell you about the attractive young lady who feigns flirtation, or the larger-than-life bonhomie-spewing lad's lad, I speak today of the insidious evil that is the telemarketer.
I'm sick of these calls, so I've done something about it. No, I'm not talking about the truly wonderful Telecrapper 2000, which plays phrases of encouragement to telemarketers and records the resulting inane and circular conversation.
I simply opted out.
You can discover how to get officially de-listed from the National Directory Database (NDD) here. Unfortunately, it seems you'll have to return a return a physically signed form. No online opt-out is allowed for this pompously important ceremonial occasion, only the ancient manner of the ballpoint pen and stamp (as our forefathers once used) is acceptable to the Gods of Telemarketing (tremble before them, vassal!); i.e. they just make it as much of a pain in the ass to escape as possible.
But I urge you to take up those cudgels, or at least that pen, and deny them the satisfaction of immediate intimate access to your shell-like, whenever it darn suits them.