Return of the Bearded One

After one whole calendar month, Darwin is back…

And I half-expected to arrive home to a sad and empty, tumble weed strewn site, real ghost town stuff (a sign creaks in the wind, a dog barks…that kind of thing). But, lo and behold, my visits and hits remained constant, and even spiked a little during my absence–which brings the awful realisation that my blog is actually more popular when I am not writing it.

Well, to be honest, most of the interest was spurred by new events in the unfortunate Happy Kelly case, and people flocked to read about my recent bitch-slapping of that infamous tea-leaf reader Dennis McKenzie. But enough of that sad story.

Instead, for your delectation, I present a grotesquely exaggerated physical and allegorical representation of my battle against frauds of all colours and creeds: Yes, it's a genuine Japanese Kiai Master getting his ass kicked good-oh.

First, a quick introduction to the dubious fairytale energy called Kiai, taken from a BBC Three programme. I like how they've helpfully added mysterious SFX waves of power emanating from Master Sasaki's mighty pot belly.

And here is the show we all came to see–the fantasy of sceptics everywhere who for so many years have had to witness this sort of unholy bollox–the promised proverbial ass-kicking.

Here, an even more venerable Kiai Master, Ryukerin, believes (as do his acolytes) that thanks to his 'invisible powers' he is an unbeatable fighting machine. Oh God, is he about to get served, and big time!

*Sigh* and just in time for Christmas…thank you Jeebus!

*Wets self slightly*

Ahem. I was also thrilled to see the admirable sportsmanship shown by this (in all honesty, quite average) MMA fighter. He displayed respect and courtesy before/during the bout, and was the first one to rush to assist the deluded old Mr Miyagi as he lay foetal and, presumably weeping, after only (what we'd call in Limerick) a 'couple of slaps'.

I'd have hated if this blow for reality and common sense were delivered by a mere thug. Hear hear! More of this!